I Want A Man

I want a man who will move the hair away from my eyes, and then kiss me. I want a man who is more goofy than romantic, but knows the right things to say at the right times. A man who will throw stuffed animals at me when I acted dumb and then jump on me and kiss me a million times. I want a man who will bet kisses on who could beat who at a game, who makes fun of me just to make me laugh and a man who will surprise me with 25 cent rings. I want a man that will bet me how far I can spit my gum, a man will dance with me in our pajamas, a man who could sit with me on the kitchen floor and eat turkey sandwiches with Doritos in them. I want a man who will share his lollipops with me, and make funny faces at me when I’m on the phone. I want a man who will squirt water guns at me in the house after I’ve gotten him soaked by the kitchen sink hose. But mostly I want you back…

I’ve been thinking of you a lot lately. You’ve been the first thought I have when I wake in the morning and the last before I drift off to sleep at night. Your birthday is coming up and you’re not here to celebrate it. You’re not going to turn into the 26 year old man you should be but instead you'll always be the 23 year old that you were. I think that out of everything thats what's going to kill me the most.

I miss everything about you. I mostly miss the way you treated me. I always felt safe with you, the world was perfect and everything was in place. Ever sense you left… things have fallen apart. I’m never happy. I try to be. I want to be but it just isn’t there. The idea of being with someone is just sicken to me because I know it won’t even compare to what you and I had.

Remember that voicemail you left me on my phone knowing that I was asleep and I would hear it in the morning. You probably don’t remember, but I saved it for months just to have something to smile about whenever I missed you. I remember the time we had been on the phone for four hours and you wanted me to count to three in Spanish like Dora the Explorer with you because neither of us would hang up first. I’d give anything to hear you make fun of my laugh or the way I talk about certain things, and/or I wouldn’t even mind having another one of those stupid arguments that springs up from a misunderstanding just so I could talk to you.

I’m going crazy without you but lately I’ve managed to permanently plant you in my brain. As much as I love you; you need to get you out... please!